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The Last Bastion of America's Liberal Media

29 Mar, 2004

Turd of the Week

Condi Rice, if only you went after Al Qaeda with the same vigor expended to destroy Richard Clarke...



Blabbering Bush Head

Click head for fresh random quote from
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Iraq War Cost
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Civilian casualties update
This data is an accounting of civilian deaths in Iraq to date.
See Iraqbodycount.net for statistical methodologies


Growing fat off juicy Iraqi rebuildin' contracts. Did you know the bin Laden group is one of our top investors?

screw all the other stockholders, we're cashing out!

Hey, what do you know? We make money from American militarily screwed up countries in the Middle East!

We're already negotiating with the “new Iraqi democracy” for oil rights!

Selling weapons all over the globe to ensure civilian death and instability which in turn ensures a strong market for years and years...



The World is Better off Without Saddam, Right?
I mean, he's an evil guy! He tried to kill a US president! He gassed the Kurds! He tortured dudes! So the world must be better off without him, right? No killer, no killed, right?

Well kids, the world is better off without him, if we narrow our view sufficiently, and address the following accompanying untidy circumstances thusly:

  • ignore the ill-will America has fomented around the world, not just in Islamic countries, but among former allies
  • pretend that Iraq is not teetering toward civil war between politically disenfranchised populations
  • dismiss that the invasion validates one of Osama bin Laden's primary tenets- that America is trying to unilaterally dominate the world and will do so by invading oil rich Arabic lands for starters

our irrational focus on Iraq and accompanying distraction from Al Qaeda has given Al Qeada precious time to regroup and more disastrously, to recruit and splinter into smaller more elusive fragments. Each of these splinter groups pursuing what once was a fringe fanatical pursuit of toppling America, but has now blossomed into a full-fledged movement at
the unwitting sponsorship of George Bush.

So, to simply answer the question "Is the world better off without Saddam?" Sure, go ahead and justify any horrific set of outcomes based on one isolated improvement in the world. Just make sure you stop there and ignore the context.

Neck Deep in the Quagmire
Last week, we examined Republican Richard Clarke's interview on 60 minutes, predicting big things from his testimony before the committee to investigate terrorism. We did not realize just how big. We failed to predict the extent to which Clarke's testimony would push Bush into a corner, sending out his attack cronies to every corner of the media universe - including Cheney shoring up the base with Dope Fiend Limbaugh and Condi spewing venom across the morning talk shows (but too busy to testify to the Senate committee under oath or publicly).

Nonetheless, Clarke is not a lone voice. From Republican Paul O'Neill to Republican John Ashcroft's own budget cutting initiatives, there is much corroborative evidence that the Bushies did not understand the terrorism threat. Worse though, once it bit them on the ass, they saw it as an excuse to push their irrelevant Iraq initiative, rather than face the real threat head full force.

A picture is emerging of a Bush White House, which chose to Chicken-Littlize outgoing Clinton administration warnings of terrorism, in favor of cold war priorities. Then, of conspiring to deceive the emotionally vulnerable American public into directing their fear in an utterly irrelevant direction.

As the Crap Sickened Pundit reviews the state of thangs with his token conservative buddies, a deep unease is emerging. Gone is the hubris that America is beating the world into submission and bending it to our way of thinking.

Zygote Rights?
While the rest of us are ripping our hair out at the emerging confirmation of Operation Asleep at the Terror Switch, Bush is signing into the law some lame-assed pre-born human rights bill. If you commit a crime and the victim is pregnant, it's a two-fer.

What this bill is really about is taking more than a baby step toward the abrogation of women's rights. They'll humanize an egg cluster and then it's just another hop toward the back-alleyization of abortion. The supreme court already ruled on this issue. The rest of the world is pretty clear. But "conservatives" feel it is imperative that government make decisions for women, knowing what is best for them.

Hey Ladies? Ain't it great having a gubbment that protects you from your own anguished judgment?

Happy Anniversary Liberated Iraq!
It's been over a year since Operation Liberation Eagle Talon Freedom Biggie Size with Ketchup kicked off. So, how are we doing? As Rumsfeld promised, we do not know the timetable for freedom. As Rumsfeld promised, we can't say when it'll chill down. As Rumsfeld promised, we can't rule out finding scores of weapons of mass destruction, aimed at the United States... ever. Well, anyway, the country is free of Saddam Hussein himself and most of his dispersed DNA has been subjugated and paraded around FoxNews until the right wing pundits picked souvenir bits of flesh off of what are now a pair of bleached skulls.

No longer are people being discriminately killed by Saddam's Royal Army. The killing is more indiscriminate and being done by a more mysterious force, but that's the cost of progress, folks! The point isn't that people are being victimized by terror as they go about their lives. The point is that it's no longer Saddam sponsored terror and that, my friend, is the only thing that matters in measuring success.

We need to face the inevitable conclusion that Iraq is a mess too big, too deep and too wide for one country, even the mighty USA to clean it up. We need help from everyone, including (gulp!) other middle eastern countries.

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